Frigg and Mafdet ([info]antipope_cats) wrote,
@ 2007-05-07 16:50:00
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Current location:On the duvet cover, on the bed, upstairs, in the bedroom
Current mood: curious

Can food apes see?
I am a little confused. I realise this is an unusual condition for one such as I, but it is the case. I have always believed that food apes could not see, at least not without lots and lots of light. Because of this, I have always tried to keep away from their enormous feet lest they tread on me and hurt me.

Last night, [info]feorag came in really late. It was getting light outside, but not enough to make any difference to the light levels in the hall and on the staircase. When she went to bed, I was on the stairs, a few stairs up. I was about to get out of her way when she said hello to me and started stroking me. It was good. It was also very dark, so I cannot work out how she knew I was there. It seems unlikely that food apes can see in the dark, so I am going to continue running away from their feet and assume it was all [info]fluffcthulhu's doing.


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[info]chuck_lw
2007-05-07 04:30 pm UTC (link)
I'm in that minority of food apeshumans who can see black cats in the dark. Does that make me the equivalent of a black cat bogeyman? They always get scared and flee when I see them sitting next to the sidewalk.

"Ha! You can't see me. I blend in with the night. You'll walk right past me and never... WHAT? AAARGH!" *runs away*

Then they go off and talk to their other black cat friends, and recount their terrifying tale of the human who saw them in the dark.

No one believes them.

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[info]antipope_cats
2007-05-07 04:41 pm UTC (link)
Are you saying there are food apes who can see black cats in the dark? And [info]feorag might be one of those? That's a little scary. Can they see me in the light, too?

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[info]chuck_lw
2007-05-07 07:08 pm UTC (link)
>Can they see me in the light, too?

Yes. But you're not without options.

If there's a really tall bookcase or another similarly large piece of furniture around, station yourself on top of that. The food apes are less likely to see you if you're above their head level. But make sure you try to make eye contact (preferably with a crouched posture, with eyes wide as possible). If you're not looking at them, they'll definitely see you. If you do it right, the food apes will have a nagging feeling they're being watched, but that's O.K. because they won't know where it's coming from.

Also, if you want to try a riskier form of stealth, try curling up on the couch with one eye cracked open. When the food apes come to accidentally sit on you (large bowl of dip in one hand, economy-sized bag of potato chips in the other, juggling the remote control between both hands) quickly, and quietly, run off and hide under another piece of furniture.

Hmmm. Sharing this information is making me feel like I'm selling out the rest of my black cat bogeymen brethren.

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[info]la_marquise_de_
2007-05-07 08:42 pm UTC (link)
I have trained mine to detect me at my pleasure by the use of proper stimuli: if they are being relatively good, I reward them with brushes from the tips of my whiskers. If they are being their ususal dense selves, I use my carefully-graded series of bites to the toes. This uusally prevents treadage, and can often result in very pleasant brushing. Are you sure none of your whiskers contacted your food-ape in the dark?
Moon cat

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[info]cat_herder
2007-05-07 08:43 pm UTC (link)
Well, dearest Frigg, if you see a food ape who reeks of American cats, do run clear. That food ape is completely incapable of seeing black cats in the dark (or finding her ass with both hands), which is why that food ape has pale cats.

Running away from thundering food ape feet is a good idea, when you think of it.

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Off topic!!
[info]desperance
2007-05-08 05:21 pm UTC (link)
Frigg, Frigg! did you know you have a magazine? It is here: http://www.friggmagazine.com/

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